In one of my pastor's messages he mentioned how a gal should look for a boy friend
It is very unusual ... I never heard of it before anywhere else ... I think this is also how a guy look for a girl friend too ...
so i would like to share with you ...
It is not how spiritual the person is ... (I was shocked!!!)
Yes, the person should preferably be found in church setting ... (Jesus sat at the well,
Abraham's servant found a wife for Isaac at the well, well here could mean church,
a place where you are nourished with the water of God's word) ... of the same faith ...
But what shocked me most is really a good companion or life partner is not necessarily someone
who is very busy serving the Lord in church.
Or even someone who is very busy in his/her life in his/her career.
Esp when we ourselves are the types that prefer our partner to spend time with us, with the family,
play with us, eat with us, enjoy life with us types ... if ... we find someone who is always so busy and
running around outside very much ... how can he/she afford time for his/her loved ones at home?
These family members would have to be very independant and also sacrificial
(willing to let go of the person for a bigger "good") ...
otherwise the homely partner would be at a disadvantage in the marriage.
Well, for every sacrifice that churchy partner makes, he/she better makes sure his/her family gets quality time
and attention and not have the feeling of abandonment or insecurity.
Come to think of this, we really appreciate the time and sacrifices our pastors and families
have made for our sakes. Of course I really wish and also pray for them,
that these full-time ministers would also juggle time spent in ministry as well as time spent with family appropriately.
Like I ever said, We don't need a partner who throws the Bible at us,
demanding me to meet the demands of the Word.
For example "You are wife, you must submit to me your husband." (Implying that everything he says I must obey and do???) .
We need someone who truly loves me and loves me at my level as myself ...
and knowing my faults, gently come alongside help me improve.
We don't need a nagger, neither do we need someone who is always pointing out our faults.
Really, life is too short for such nonsense.
We need someone who loves us ... fans into flames and hones our strengths.
In this way, I think we can bloom more beautifully.
Even plants respond positively to classical music and postive words,
and they respond badly when people speak terrible words to them (experimentally proven).
Likewise, this should also be how we teach our little ones too.
Not nagging, but coming alongside helping them along.
Even Jesus, the Lord of the Ressurection and the Life, did not reprimand his very loved disciple,
Thomas for saying "Let us also go, that we may die with him. " John 11:16b
What I am trying to say is, to makes things work, there must be much grace.
Grace that overlooks faults and gently reaches out in love.
